Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
