Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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