if only i could text you this smell
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
bring money and cleavage
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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