if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
