i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
In other news, I just burned my penis
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
