I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
