I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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