Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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