ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
