..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
