Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
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