Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
