bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Randomize
