I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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