Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
