the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Randomize
