Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
