My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
