Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
