Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Randomize
