ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Randomize
