he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
