You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
