i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
You need Xanax blowdarts
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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