So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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