it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
