watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
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