Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
They took my balls.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
