he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
