If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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