I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
