wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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