i think i have herpe
just one?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize
