yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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