he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
