singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
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