roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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