I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Randomize