I wannas sexs uuuuu
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize