Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
