Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
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