ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
