I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
