i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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