So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
Randomize
