they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
my shit smells like andre
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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