please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize