dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
