White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
