YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
