I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
this will be a night to untag.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
