just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
